The time that I’ve taken,
I pray is not wasted,
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
– One Sweet Love, Sara Bareilles
I think in all the 30 summers that has come and passed in my life, I enjoyed this summer the most. And throughout this summer, amongst my travel companions and friends that I shared time with, I think the most compelling discussion that I had with them was about how love is defined amongst different point of views and experiences.
For some, love is being happy in your own solitude because it is easier to live life that way. It is not a compromise nor a lazy conviction but a conscious choice to be happy on your own. Life is certainly more fulfilling with someone else to prop your arm as you go up the staircase once you reach your golden years but not everyone is fearless to risk against pain and anguish just in case, in some cases, that is what it would take to fall in love with someone.
For some, they define love by seeking it in the most uncommon places, people and from the most uncommon events. It may seem glutinous for some, but who is to say what is moderate enough for a person to consume love. Who has the magic formula when it comes to this potent emotion anyways?
For some, love is trouncing previously held beliefs and giving up your son’s fate to a higher power that you once conceived as irrelevant, illogical and impractical. Love for them is what makes the impossible anathema to what lies beyond the realms of possibilities that we prefer to call life.
Throughout my life, my one definition of love is this: love is when you hold on to someone else’s hand and never ever let go of that hand all throughout the rollercoaster ride of each other’s lives. My definition has never changed but my conviction or belief on this definition would waver from time to time depending on how I would fare on my own personal relationships, romantic or otherwise. Some say that my definition is just innate fixation with object permanence, that I objectify love and thus prefer to believe that love exists as long as you hold on to it. The jury is still out and by jury; I mean time would be the judge if my definition holds water.
For one, I doubt if anybody would want to hold my hands for the longest time. My hands are rough, clammy and would produce enough sweat to water a plant for a week almost immediately once it gets into contact with any foreign object (human hands included). Although these same hands are strong and could hold on to anything for dear life indefinitely, sadly I haven’t found any hands to hold on long enough to test my definition. It goes without saying though that inasmuch as my hands are not perfect, at least anyone who holds it can be assured that I will never let go. My hands may get clammy at times; but it is because it is moist with anticipation as to where life would lead me and the other person that is holding on to it. It might be rough but it gives it a certain grip comfortable enough for the holder to hold on to forever.
I deem it necessary to apologize for such a sappy read, but I would want to define my views now, because if my critics are right, if this only object permanence, might as well will the object to exist than to pine for it forever.
Atleast not Dan Brown!
The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn’t angry enough. ~ Fr. Bede Jarrett
I was watching the Inauguration Speech of P.Noy yesterday and what struck me the most among the talking points of his speech was his stand to forgive his enemies but (sic) forgive those the wronged the Filipino people he could not.
I hope he is truly the angry President that he projects to be. Us Filipino’s are too forgiving, too forgetful. Our wrath has limited bounds. We cried for the loss of love ones during floods and other man made disasters yet we often fail to look back at those who kicked the shit out of our pants. We wail in agony for those victims of injustice and heinous crimes yet we forget to parlay such emotions into justice. Life is not fair. If somebody will slap you, God will not go down from the Heavens to put out his right cheek to take the hit for you. You either run or you can fight. Pity the fool said BA Baracus. Let us not be foolish to think that the world dispenses universal justice. That is like praying for the damnation of your would-be assassin’s soul just before he pulls the trigger on a gun pointed at your right temple.
You can either run or fight. You have no other choice but either to run or fight.
Let us be angry for those that treat us as fools. Anger is not tantamount to hatred. Sometimes anger spares us from life long hatred. Anger is the call for action. It is not for diaspora but for the congregation of individuals that would stand up and say, “This will be the last of your transgressions you piece of shit!”
Let us be angry for the right reasons and not because of fear or hate. Let us be angry because enough is enough.
Holy week na. Ano ba ang maaring puntahan para di ako mabagot. Kailangan ko mag-bakasyon. Gusto ko umalis sa paligid na familyar. Gusto ko mabasa ang aking paa sa malamig na tubig ng dagat.
Kailangan ko tumakbo. Tumakbo ng dahan-dahan. Dahan-dahan kong tatahakin ang bagong landas. Hindi ko nga alam kung nawawala ako. Basta diretso lang.Tuloy-tuloy lang. Aabot din ako sa dulo. Sa dulo ng daan, hindi ko inaasahan ko makikita ko ang kasagutan. Ang masaya, ginawa ko sya. Di ako umupo sa gilid ng tulay at tumingin lang sa mga nagdaraang bangka sa ilalim ko. Siguro may ADHD nga ako, di ako makapakali. Marami ako hinahanap kahit lahat nasa aking mga palad na. Pero masaya maghanap. Kapag wala ka na hinahanap, bulag ka na. Sabog ka na. Wala ka na pag-asa. Ang tao ay nabubuhay dahil meron sya kailangang araruhin sa araw-araw. Walang saysay ang buhay mo kung ang balak mo sa buong umaga ay tumingin sa bintana para bilangin ang mga ibong makikita mo sa mga puno.
Mayroong tinig sa iyong puso. Isang tinig na munti ngunit masidhing bumubulong, tumatawag, naririnig. “Hoy, asan ka na?.” Kung ang sagot mo “ay andito pa.” Patay tayo dyan.
May paa tayo para sumikad. Literal na sumikad. Ang mga ninuno natin ay mga nomad. Sanay tayong mawala at makabalik kung saan man tayo nanggaling. At isa pa, ang taba ko na para umupo lang maghapon dito sa opisina.
Kailangan ko ng preskong hangin. Maski dalawang araw lang. Naman.
Took the test from facebook. Here is the result:
“You’re a very unhappy person. Sad nearly all the time….:-(
Nothing makes you happy. You seem to always be in a funk and never want to join in with others. Happiness isn’t something you look for, you just accept that you’re alone, and that’s that.”
Hahaha. Sad but true.
As I’ve always told myself, once I found out who the most beautiful girl in the world was, I’ll never let her go.
Coz I’d be the biggest fool if I did.
For your comments and perusal,
Henceforth, my motto would be:
No worries, no regrets, no boundaries
Once I find my old latin dictionary, I’ll translate it into Latin (duh) and have it tattooed on my left arm lest I forgot.
Don’t ask me why I am posting this, I haven’t gotten much sleep for over 24 hours now.